Domestic abuse has a devastating effect
By Betsy Sitkoff
Domestic violence is a social epidemic that has a devastating effect. In the United States, a woman is more likely to be assaulted, injured, raped or killed by a male partner than any other assailant. The effects are felt by all of us as we were cruelly reminded this summer when Anthonia Ebrerechi Iheme was shot to death by her husband.
Iheme worked at Sholom Home West and was a mother of two small children. She obtained a harassment order when she left her husband. She feared for her safety and took the right step in protecting herself.
Iheme was not Jewish but she cared for our Jewish loved ones. She developed relationships and bonds with residents and co-workers at Sholom Home West. It was a life ended by the hands of her husband, the father of her children.
Although the reasons why people abuse and often kill their partners are complex, the steps a community can take can be quite simple.
By creating awareness, providing education and taking action we can make a difference. Create awareness to the realities of domestic abuse including the signs and symptoms. Educate families to the effects of abuse and educate teens on the danger of entering into an abusive relationship. Take action when we suspect that someone may be being abused. Intervening can be difficult, but could ultimately save lives.
The Jewish Domestic Abuse Collaborative (JDAC) provides presentations to Twin Cities community groups and professional staff that offer awareness, education and action steps necessary to address domestic abuse. In addition, Healthy Youth-Healthy Communities (HY-HC) can provide prevention education to Jewish youth to help eradicate domestic abuse and violence in the Twin Cities Jewish community.
JDAC and HY-HC are programs of the Jewish Community Health Awareness Initiative, a collaborative of Jewish Family and Children’s Service of Minneapolis and Jewish Family Service of St. Paul.
As important as awareness, education and action are, perhaps most critical is understanding that domestic abuse and violence happen in Jewish families. As Jews we are not immune; that myth only perpetuates the stigma and shame that victims live with. The myth that all Jewish homes are safe and peaceful deters Jewish abused woman and children from coming forward and getting the help they need. The myth is keeping many of our families living in harms way.
To help destruct the myth, JDAC is presenting the Twin Cities debut of a nationally-acclaimed show, “Flower’s Aren’t Enough.” This one-woman show uses actual incidents to portray Michal, a young woman who finds herself in an abusive relationship and sinks further into darkness. Michal losses control over her own life and then courageously return to self reliance.
“Flowers Aren’t Enough” will be performed at 7 p.m. Thursday, October 30, at Temple Israel, with a post-show dialogue. A survivor’s suite will be available for those who have experienced domestic abuse. The show, written and performed by Naomi Ackerman, an American-born Israeli, is free of charge.
This JDAC event is underwritten by the Elissa Heilicher Family Fund for Healthy Relationships at JFCS. Additional support is provided by the Women’s Philanthropy Divisions of both the Minneapolis Jewish Federation and the United Jewish Fund and Council of St. Paul.
For more information on this presentation and services provided by JDAC, contact Betsy Sitkoff at 952-542-4833 or bsitkoff@jfcsmpls.org.
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Betsy Sitkoff is Program Manager of the Jewish Community Health Awareness Initiative.
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